Caption It! #64

August 29th, 2005 // 48 Comments
By Miu von Furstenberg
  1. AER

    There are just too many, but I’ll start with these:

    “Where Are They Now: Rainbow Bright, Hookin’”

    “Paris Hilton finally realizes her feet are GINORMOUS and becomes confused”

  2. erin

    looks like a joint to me……..

  3. Cheesy

    “Oh, they’re right! This chewing gum and walking at the same time thing IS hard!”

    or perhaps:

    “Reefer Madness, my toe. Where are the Doritos?”

  4. Jen

    Paris Hilton learns how to walk and think at the same time

  5. MT

    If I only had a braaain da dum dee dum dee dum . . .

  6. “ok i think i got it… right foot, then left foot”

  7. Tiffany

    WHITE TRASH! Not even money could buy class!

  8. Laura Lord Belle

    Uh! oh! Did I put on the bath mat INSTEAD of my dress when leaving the bathrom of The Muppets?

  9. LIVE_WIRE

    I’m a little tea pot “HICK”… short and “hick” stout!!

  10. spitfire

    Oh sh*t! Did I forget to change out of my Care Bears nightie AGAIN?!!!

  11. jake

    like momma used to say, “there’s always a cheap hooker at the end of every rainbow.”

  12. lily

    hah. i vote for jake’s caption. hilarious!

  13. linda

    See what money can do for you.

  14. call em like i see em

    if you act now, you too can be the proud owner of your very own knock-kneed,wonkey-eyed, negative-IQed, drugged up, baby talking, spoiled brat, Paris figurine!! Don’t delay.

  15. “Damn, I was supposed to put my cloud pasties on under my dress.”

  16. Kaynice

    BLUNTE ON REALITY!?! Naw . . . just plain blasted.

  17. peanut

    Hookin’ ain’t easy!

  18. Callie

    Uhh am I the only one who adores that dress?

  19. Brian

    Yes,Callie…….you are.The only one over 10 years old anyway…….

  20. saima

    right foot, left foot…aa, um what was i doing?

  21. cakeboy

    Frankenhooker

  22. Anonymous

    Now I know this…I know this…. its right… left.. right…uh? left?

  23. TasAnnie

    Oh my god!!! No red carpet!!! What do I do???

  24. koroshiya

    “jesus CHRIST! where the FUCK are my GODDAMN implants?”

  25. Kristen

    right.. left.. right.. left.. oh shit.

  26. long lost tinkerbell

    If I do the peepee dance, I won’t pee my pants… oh wait, I don’t wear any underwear, ha!

  27. emma peel

    Oh god, i am so high right now,can someone carry me….where are my body guards?

  28. Crystal

    I just have to say, I fucking love Paris. She might be spoiled, rich (to all of our extreme jealousy), slightly less than great in the intelligence realm, beautiful (no matter how much y’all don’t want to admit it)… but holy damn. At least she gives us stuff to do on the internet, which is becoming increasingly boring day by day. Thank you Paris… may you rock on.

  29. realitybasedbob

    these damn ben wa balls are really hard to keep in

  30. K-Ren

    Come on, guys. I don’t like Paris Hilton either, but mocking her on her big feet? I have big feet too, and nobody custom-makes my shoes. Where’s the love?

  31. Cynthia

    Somebody needs to get a life! You adore this ho? GEEZ! I’ll be prayin’ for ya!

  32. Crystal

    Oh, you pathetic crab. You must have a life, you post on here.

  33. raevee nyc

    The baby giraffe learns to use its legs, one step at a time.

  34. Cynthia

    I’ve got a great life…and enough sense to know the difference between a decent person and a brain dead ho who happens to have millions. I’ve tried, and I can not find anything good about her, except, as you say, she provides good entertainment for us.

  35. Jacquelina

    Stop trying to find something good about this bitch. There isn’t anything good about her!

  36. Sam H.

    Hey! Stop picking on Paris! She’s the sexiest whore out there!

  37. Danielle

    “Only *I* can prevent forest fires”

  38. “Wow…it’s crazy, the ground is like…an ocean or something. I feel like I’m walking on egg cartons!” Paris Hilton on ecstasy.

  39. Daisy

    Recent research shows that whores on drugs immediately become pigeon toed and, for once, can close their legs.

  40. Lisa

    Looks like she is putting out her cigarette, I didn’t know she smoked? Talentless, classless wench? Yes. Smoker? No

  41. mary

    She has pretty thick thighs and legs for a girl who is so skinny on the top.

    It actually looks better than chicken legs like Ritchie’s or Lohan’s.

  42. Nora

    Yes, she is a smoker, among other things.

  43. Andrew

    Looks like the Incredible Hulk shot-off all over the bitch.

  44. lola

    she always carries that damn bag with the stars on it. i’m kind of sick of seeing it. wtf.

  45. Mouse

    FUGLY shoes

  46. LuvChoo

    Wondering if she should walk, smoke or snort the white line….

  47. Dan

    No shocker!! That Paris for you. I love you Paris, but you’re getting a little too old for this. Take a look at Nicole ;-)

  48. Silasdog

    She is human dung.

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