Britney’s Still In It To Win It

October 20th, 2007 // 12 Comments

In case you were thinking that Ms. Britney Spears is getting her life together, I regretfully inform you that the song remains the same. The court ordered Brit to meet with a parenting coach as one of the steps to getting back her kids. The coach has asked the court if she can move on because Britney can’t even be bothered to show up for meetings.

Sources say Britney had a scheduled time to meet the coach yesterday at her Malibu home. The coach made the trek, but no Britney.

We’re told during the hearing earlier this week, the coach phoned in and asked the Commissioner if she could end the home visits, presumably because they were going nowhere. Seems like Britney was ignoring the coach — like everyone else who gives her advice.

Britney was also overheard asking why the judge didn’t “lock down” the courthouse for her as she was leaving her hearing last week. You’re totally right, sweetie. Why don’t we just all freeze in place until you pass by? It’s not like anyone else had anything to do in the courthouse that day. Because the world is your oyster, princess! Does anyone get the feeling she doesn’t WANT her kids back? When the parenting coach shows up, I suspect she purposely asks questions like “I can hit em’ if they cry, right?” and “how often do those little bastards have to eat?” Here’s an idea. If you’re not ready to be a parent, don’t get knocked up! Don’t have a kid just to satisfy your ego, you dumb bitch!


By J. Harvey

  1. jbonz

    Well now, after all, I really feel sorry for poor Britney, it must be awful tough for a little girl having the paparazzi trailing her around everywhere she goes, never having any peace or privacy, I just feel so sorry for Britney living in the public eye like that, the poor thing…

  2. Lisa

    If it’s so damn tough having the paps trail you around, maybe she should think about not telling ‘em where she’s gonna be. Or just brewing a cup of coffee at home. The rest of us seem to manage drinking it without having to go to Starbucks all the time.

  3. shadygoddess13

    Shut your legs or get a womb-removal, you skank whore.

    Thank God for Judge Marilyn O’Connor in New York. I read that this woman told a pair of people to stop breeding, by order of the law! They had four kids, two of which tested positive for crack in their systems as babies. All four are in other homes. Then these “parents” decide to have a fifth kid. They couldn’t even take care of the four they already had!!!! In this case, I say people’s sexual practices should be mandated, because I’m sick of child abuse by FUCKTARDS. Britney needs a beat down.

  4. Natt

    I just would like to kick her in the fucking head. What a waste of Oxygen.

  5. Ruby Jackson

    Those poor boys.

  6. jimi

    There’s no question that the paps have reached a point of worse than vermin. But, two things. One, the public buys into this crap. It boggles my mind that Britney has fans anymore. But she does. Why do people clamor over Paris? Why does E continue to run programs featuring skanks, idiots, and thugs? One thing is for sure, stop the attention and these skanks would go away. But I doubt that will ever happen. Too bad.

    Two, Britney likely wouldn’t garner all the attention she’s getting if 1, she wasn’t an idiot, 2, wore underwear, and 3, wasn’t an attention whore. Trust me, she likes it. She’s just too stupid to realize how stupid she looks to most people. And it those people who perpetuate her ego. If she really wanted to, she could go about things a little less noticed. She just doesn’t choose that. It’s disgusting.

  7. kellygrrrl

    Britney is so accustomed to EVERYONE loving her unconditionally and she never has had to give any real LOVE back.
    She obviously thought it would be the same with kids

  8. lookalike

    She’s sick, very, very sick. Too bad her family or the court cannot commit her for her own good. One day if she lives long enough she will regret all the selfish and hurtful things she has done to her self and to her children. I can’t imagine the guilt and shame she tries to ignore by using drugs and surrounding herself with sycophants. It would be a great day for humanity if the paps could stop following her and let her deal with ther emotions and totally fucked up life.

  9. lookalike

    sorry for the typos

  10. Hey Cupcake

    Why don’t we freeze in place while she passes by? (Good one, btw). Who would hand her her Taco Bell, McDonalds, and 15,000-calorie frappucinos? Who would photograph her leaving the 7-11 bathroom at 2 am, wearing a shirt and boots (and nothing else)?

    Seriously, it’s clear that she WANTS the public to destroy her at this point. Obviously could give sh*t about her kids, career, personal hygiene, reputation, and sanctity of her cooch. The problem is, she doesn’t just fall off the ladder and disappear. We have to watch her hit EVERY SINGLE RUNG on the way down, in slow motion, for YEARS on end. Haven’t we suffered enough?

  11. joan durtz

    She looks fatter and greasier every day. She needs to keep her trashy ass at home and take care of those Chris Farley looking sons of hers.

  12. Mommie Dearest

    Mommy had,
    a little baby.
    There he is,
    fast asleep.
    He’s just,
    a little plaything.
    Why not,
    wake him up?
    Cute, cute,
    little baby.
    Little pee pee,
    little toes.
    Now he’s,
    coming to me.
    Crawl across,
    the kitchen floor.

    Baby, baby, please let me hold him
    I wanna make him stay up all night
    Sister, sister, he’s just a plaything
    We wanna make him stay up all night
    Yeah we do

    See him drink,
    from a bottle.
    See him eat,
    from a plate.
    Cute, cute,
    as a button.
    Don’t you wanna make him,
    stay up late.
    We’re having fun,
    with no money.
    Little smile,
    on his face.
    Don’t cha love,
    the little baby.
    Don’t you wanna make him,
    stay up late.

    Here we go (all night long)
    Sister, sister (all night long
    In the playpen..woo…(all night long)
    Little baby goes ha! (all night long)
    I know you wanna leave me…

    Why don’t,
    we pretend.
    There you go,
    little man.
    Cute, cute,
    why not?
    Late at night,
    wake him up!


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