Britney’s Obituary is Already Written

January 17th, 2008 // 18 Comments

The Associated Press is ready to go, should an untimely tragic end strike pop star, Britney Spears. Us Weekly chatted with AP’s entertainment editor Jesse Washington about the fact that they already have an obituary prepared for Ms. Spears, just in case. According to Washington, “We are not wishing it, but if Britney passed away, it’s easily one of the biggest stories in a long time.”

Yikes. Even though it’s not uncommon for agencies to prepare obituaries for personalities of note over a certain age, it’s still feels weird to see it in writing. But, we shouldn’t worry too much guys, because apparently, Britney’s buddy, Sam lufti recently assured Ryan Seacrest on his radio show that “everything’s fine.” TRANSLATION: Her ATM card still works.

Photos: Bauer-Griffin Online

More photos of funny lady Britney Spears are after the jump.

(Hint – Right-click on the image thumbnails with your mouse to open them in a new tab or window.)

Photos: Bauer-Griffin Online

By Lisa Timmons
  1. FuntKase

    Here’s hoping we see that tidbit splashed on front pages of newspapers and blogs all over the world very soon.

    Cheers!

  2. Frida

    FuntKase – that’s absolutely disgusting!

  3. Sambo

    I don’t know for sure, but if you look at Britney’s knuckles in the close up pictures, it looks like she has scars on them. That usually means bulimia. Hmmm…

  4. How come you keep calling this guy Sam “Lufti”? His last name is Lutfi, not Lufti.

  5. ella

    ….ouch.

    You know you need to take a long, hard look at your life WHEN.

  6. ginger

    what the fug is she wearing now??
    sick.

  7. sizzler

    Anna Nicole Smith anyone?

  8. green cardigan

    Long life Britney. A lot of people out here are hoping you pull it together.

  9. May

    I hope they publish it tomorrow.

  10. Jennifer

    I think it’s just disgusting they’d write an obituary for a 26 year-old before she’s dead and then splash the fact all over. They’re vultures!

  11. Pixel

    Pretty standard procedure. The AP has obits in waiting for countless celebs and politicians that they constantly update when needed and can be released in a moment’s notice when a death is confirmed. Don’t know why everyone is making a stink about this they’ve been doing this forever.

  12. T-Bone

    Is this what we’ve come to??? Waiting for someone to die just to sell stories???

    I say those wishing death upon this girl are FAR sicker than she will ever be.

  13. SLOW NEWS DECADE

    “We are not wishing it, but if Britney passed away, it’s easily one of the biggest stories in a long time.”

    SLOW NEWS DECADE + USA is full of fucking retards = Britney is a big story.

  14. BeautifulDoll

    Britney, you gotta pull through, after all you’ve been through you can still fight!! You’ll win your kids back! So keep strong and you’ll make it through ? ? Xoxox

  15. BeautifulDoll

    Britney, you gotta pull through, after all you’ve been through you can still fight!! You’ll win your kids back! So keep strong and you’ll make it through ? ? Xoxox

  16. BeautifulDoll

    Britney, you gotta pull through, after all you’ve been through you can still fight!! You’ll win your kids back! So keep strong and you’ll make it through ? ? Xoxox

  17. BeautifulDoll

    Britney, you gotta pull through, after all you’ve been through you can still fight!! You’ll win your kids back! So keep strong and you’ll make it through ? ? Xoxox

  18. BeautifulDoll

    Britney, you gotta pull through, after all you’ve been through you can still fight!! You’ll win your kids back! So keep strong and you’ll make it through! Xoxox

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