Britney Hopes “Comeback” Performance At VMAS Will Make Us Forget She’s Toe-Up And In Lots Of Trouble

August 15th, 2007 // 11 Comments

This performance better be Queen at Live-Aid. Hendrix at Woodstock. It better be Judy Garland at Carnegie Hall right before her ass died. It better be L.L. Cool J doing “Mama Said Knock You Out” with the deodorant hanging out of his pits on MTV Unplugged. It better be Ricky Martin at the Grammys making us think he was straight! It better be them rolling the rock back and Jesus had high-tailed it outta there! Insert other famous kickass performances here. Britney’s planning to redeem herself by performing at the VMAS. Seriously, she needs to bring it because redemption isn’t in the cards. She’s Bill Buckner at this point. Look, a straight sports reference!

Britney Spears is preparing for a “surprise” performance at the MTV Video Music Awards Sept. 9 in Vegas. One insider tells us Brit’s recent meetings with manager Jeff Kwatinetz are geared toward fine-tuning her routine, and that her label is worried any missteps (or a no-show) could hurt her comeback.

Seriously, make some blind children see. That might work.

By J. Harvey

  1. sanp-4-d-kids

    very appropiate song.. i cant wait to see this mess she wearing one shoe, weave falling out, no underwear, chewing gum jayden on her side nursing on her breast… I CANT WAIT

  2. hmweis1

    I would ask what Mtv is thinking inviting her to perform, but I have a feeling we’ll be seeing clips of that performance for a long time to come. See the trainwreck y’all!!

  3. Shasta

    This is either totally untrue or she won’t show up, IMO.

  4. jill

    Good job on the straight sports reference, J. Although the name Bill Buckner gives me an inexplicable twitch that only us Bostonians could understand. Watching that “Crazy” video made me think…seriously, WTF happened to this chick???

  5. Buzz

    Speaking of Judy Garland, there is an exciting, and wildly popular new group on Yahoo called The Judy Garland Experience. The group features lively discussions, great photo’s, and the most amazing music files anywhere. This week they are featuring a retrospective of Judy’s performances at the London Palladium 1951-1969 with all never before released performances. They also have all of Judy’s tracks from The Hollywood Palace as well as many other rarities. And if that’s not enough they are even featuring a rare solo concert that Liza Minnelli performed at The Palladium a few years back.
    The membership of the group includes Garland family members, other celebrities, author’s, people who have made films about Judy Garland, and fans from all levels and backgrounds. The only thing missing is you!
    Come check it out, you may never want to leave!

  6. Capt. America

    Prediction: She f*cks up so badly, that the performance will not even be able to be aired on the show.

    Then, hopefully she will find a skanky motel, check herself in, tie off, and shoot herself off to the moon.

  7. Tanner

    Every performance Britney has done at the VMAs has been amazing! I have no doubt that this will blow everyone away!

  8. shell

    I think that the main thing hurting her “comeback” is that it’s a complete and total impossibility. But yeah, making blind kids see might be a start.

  9. jesse d

    I am, in the tiniest corner of my black, frozen heart, hoping she will come out with her REAL hair, a sexy NOT SLUTTY costume, and blow. us. away. The rest of me KNOWS she’s going to crash and burn yet again.

  10. Bluegirl

    Damn, that was a pretty obscure reference to LL…I thought I was the only one who remembered the deodorant balls! lol….

  11. bkmagnolia

    j.harvey! you’re a mess & i love it. the LL on Unplugged reference was FAN-tastic. that was by far one of the best hip hop performances i have ever seen – deodorant balls & all.

    love you tender!

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