Britney Spears: Not Drunk, Not High, Just Crazy

January 7th, 2008 // 11 Comments

How many crappy photos of this ambulance on that particular night are there? Never fear, we’ll run them all! In part three of our expose on how Britney’s main problem is that she’s looney tunes and needs mental health assistance, we reveal to you that apparently Britney tested negative for the prescence of drugs or alcohol last week during Pop Star Meltdown 2008. Everyone assumes she’s on the tina, but maybe not. The only chemicals in question seem to be the ones that are vortexing her brain chemistry. A source says that “this lady is as clean as clean can be, and has been for some time.” And that the rumors of her threatening to off herself as “bullshit”. I guess frappucinnos don’t leave any residue.

Oh, and Dr. (I’ll say it again, Bald Whore) Phil responded to criticism and told the Early Show this morning that Britney’s parents definitely asked him to go see her. Why would they approach some tv goofball and not an actual professional who’s not looking for some ink? Dr. Tool said “I went to see Britney at the request of her family, I talked to [her mother] Lynne, I talked to [her father] Jamie, I talked to Bryan, her brother. They were very frustrated that she apparently wasn’t going to be held for a longer period of time.” We all were. Dr. Phil also reveals that his wife Robin is close with Lynne and that’s how he got involved. And in the middle of “setting the record straight”, he also revealed that he’s been talking to the family about Britney’s problems for almost a year. Is he billing them? For real, I want to see his diploma.

Britney’s Mom obviously has this whole weird celebrity treatment for the cameras thing planned from the beginning. Please keep in mind that Dr. Phil says he spent an hour with Britney in her room and other sources said it was more like 15 minutes of him standing there getting spattered with her blood as she tried to yank her IV out. Judge for yourself who’s truthful in this sitch.

By J. Harvey

  1. Nanc'

    Ok, J.,
    Again, I think Dr. Phil has possibly become too concerned with his ratings BUT he is a real doctor with a Bachelor of Arts degree in Psychology and a Master’s degree in Experimental Psychology, and a Ph.D in Clinical Psychology from the University of North Texas.

    Now, if I “knew” him (as Brit’s parents seem to) and my daughter was in a psycho breakdown, I probably would ask him to talk to her and that’s all he did…talk to her.

    Unfortunately, no one has committed the poor child and that’s what needs to be done by hook or crook. I don’t know what the current laws are but I’m betting that mom and dad Spears COULD have their lawyers (who are always on retainer) do something to allow them to force the girl into help into the best facility in the Country.

    You can NOT reason with a person who is mentally ill and/or addicted to drugs. They NEED an intervention and nobody seems to be willing to do this for Brit including her ex-Fed who KNEW she had problems and bailed on her rather than staying to help.
    “Father of the Year” my ass.

  2. Nanc'

    If I (God forbid) ever had to have my daughter committed or if she was ever in a hospital (our youngest was) her Daddy and I would not let her out of our sights (we didn’t) for one – damn – minute. Meanwhile, Mama Spears is in Louisiana. Brit has been abandoned.

  3. PinkWeenie

    Dr. Phil has been talking to the family for a year about this “sitch”… and Britney is in the beyond sad state she is in now. What does that tell you?

    Real doctor or not… he sold out to the fame and fortune gods years ago and has zero credibility and even less concern about the people he purports to want to help. The only thing he cares about is himself.

  4. Zekers

    Pretty obvious to me that calling Dr. Phil was a publicity stunt…there is no other reasonable explanation.
    I’ve been saying all along that Britney is mentally ill and not drug addicted…hope she gets some appropriate meds and therapy now.
    …and Nanc’, she can’t be committed against her will unless she is overtly harming herself/others…laws were enacted back in the 70′s…it was too easy prior to that time to commit someone…now its too hard!

  5. Nanc'

    Thanks for the legal info. I was wondering.

    However, if my daughter was “nuts”, her dad and I would “kidnap” her and bring her home and bring in pros to help her.
    IF she decided later to press charges, we’d deal with it. We’ve both been trained to be POWs; jail doesn’t mean s**t to us.
    I would do whatever it took to help my kid(s)and deal with any consequences because THAT’S WHAT GOOD PARENTS DO.

  6. FreakyZ

    “I would do whatever it took to help my kid(s)and deal with any consequences because THAT’S WHAT GOOD PARENTS DO.”

    Amen, sister! I am so sick of hearing how they couldn’t LEGALLY do anything to help her. She’s your fucking child dammit. You’re letting the law dictate what you “can” do? Some situations supercede… this is one of them.

  7. debkakes

    Bipolar disorder does not equal crazy.
    Save that talk.

  8. jimi

    A “reliable source” said Britney tested negative for drugs and alcohol.

    I say, hold the phone. We know nothing, yet. Toxicology tests can take days to get.

  9. zelda

    I am glad this situation is at least bringing national attention to mental health issues. This country has terrible mental health facilities. Individual doctors are excellent but there is not enough funding for mental health to create excellent care facilities for people who need 24/7 attention during a mental health crisis. Too often these people get shoved into empty rooms for days at a stretch, and have only endless hours of television and sparse visitor hours to keep them occupied. How is that healthy for anyone, much less someone with mental problems? My sister has bipolar disorder and it is a serious illness requiring intense medical, behavioral and talk therapy in order to live a “normal” life.

    Also, people need to learn the laws. You can’t commit someone against their will unless they present a clear danger to others. And Britney is an adult, so her parents have no legal rights over her any more. Whether or not you’re sick of hearing people say that…it’s true. You can’t force someone to do something against their will unless they are infringing upon the rights of others…welcome to america.

  10. This is actually bad news

  11. btchyspice

    amen, pinkweenie!!!

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