BREAKING NEWS: Mariah Carey Is Reportedly Engaged To Nick Cannon!

Oh, lay me to the rest with all of the other lambs, Access Hollywood is saying that Mariah Carey,38, is engaged to actor Nick Cannon,27! Can a church hold that much pink tafetta? You know her colors are blush and bashful and all the bridesmaids will carry music boxes playing “Vision of Love” and she will have a genetically engineered unicorn carry her ass to the altar.

A source says that Mariah, who was recently linked with record executive Mark Sudack, is indeed betrothed to Cannon. She was recently spotted at the premiere party for her film Tennessee sporting a huge rock on her dainty finger.

Mariah was previously married to record executive Tommy Mottola until their divorce in 1998. Nick Cannon broke off his engagement to model Selita Ebanks last year.

Know this, the wedding dress will be very, very tight.