Brad Pitt Does His Civic Duty
It’s comforting that Brad Pitt has to go through the ponderousness of jury duty. Celebrities can commit multiple D.U.I’s and leave the scene of accidents and so on and not get punished. But no one escapes jury duty! Even Brad Pitt has to watch Diane Sawyer explain how a courtroom works in that damn film. He showed up today and was given his own private room so no one would bug him, or ask him for semen, or try to kidnap him.
Brad arrived to court in a chauffeured SUV and was allowed to park in the employee lot. He’s wearing a white t-shirt, dark jeans and a cool black cap. Pitt brought a book with him — maybe it’s “First Wives Club.” He was ushered to a private room, where he waited until he went to the jury assembly room for orientation along with other would-be jurors.
It turns out he was about to be put on a jury, but there was a last minute plea agreement so he was allowed to go back to the multicultural fantasyland he shares with the Most Beautiful Woman In the World. It occurs to me that if actually was on a jury and it was a murder case, people might do whatever the hell he said because he’s pretty and globally famous. “I saw he gets the needle” “Brad, the guy’s up for cashing stolen checks.” “He deserves to die.” “Ok, Brad! Gosh, you’re handsome. Is Angelina really that beautiful up close?”