Bongo Butt-Playing Janet Jackson Denies Having Hidden Child

“I do not have a child and all allegations saying so are false,” Janet Jackson said in a statement released to the syndicated “Access Hollywood” TV show. Well, I’m happy we’ve cleared that up.

Her poor lawyers have been working overtime as of late. Between the alleged child, and purging the internet of the nude sunbathing video, they seem to have their work cut out for them.

Jackson Denies Claim She Has Secret Child [AP]
Goofy video embarrasses Janet Jackson [Scoop]