Britney? (Ashton Kutcher Plays Around)

Here’s tall goof Ashton Kutcher making like Britney Spears on the set of his new flick. You can play Britney, too. Just get a ciggie, a venti iced coffee and a controlling father to exorcise your panty demons.

Ashton’s new foray into television is called Pop Fiction. It’s like Punk’d, except that Ashton teams up with celebrities to play jokes on the tabloids by creating situations. It’s stupid. If they had something actually hot, like Angelina Jolie and Jennifer Aniston punching each other in the street, I would be into it. Instead, it’s ridiculous stuff like Avril Lavigne maybe being pregnant and Mario Lopez giving Eva Longoria a necklace. BORING!

The tabloid media at large agrees that it’s kinda dumb, because who the hell sympathizes with celebrities? They have money and are impossibly beautiful. It would be a different story if it were poor people with syphilis striking back. One tabloid editor commented on the fact that the tabs know what celebs are up to before they do.

“There’s nothing these people do that we don’t know about before they get there. We know everything. Ninety percent of their lives are put together by other people. It’s almost like these celebs have LoJack. It’s easy to track them,” he said.

Another weekly editor said, “In Hollywood, anytime anyone decides to be in on the joke and critique themselves, no one cares. It’s not having the effect they thought it would. No one can sympathize with celebs. They’re always in on it themselves, whether they’re pulling the joke or not.”

Seriously. And even if they do pull one over on us here at ASL, we’re just going to exaggerate it anyway and blow it out of all sorts of proportion for laughs. We write about things like Amy Winehouse rubbing her own urine on her face. Who can tell what’s a joke and what’s not anymore? Dumbasses.


19 more photos of Ashton Kutcher and Margarita Levieva on the set of Spread are after the jump.

(Hint – Right-click on the image thumbnails with your mouse to open them in a new tab or window.)